Becoming a Likeable Badass in Academic Librarianship

In academic librarianship, we wear many hats—leaders, collaborators, advocates, and sometimes mediators. How we navigate these roles often determines our success and the success of our libraries. But the question remains: how do we balance strength and warmth? How do we advocate for ourselves, our teams, and our libraries without alienating those we need to influence?

Alison Fragale’s Likeable Badass framework offers a roadmap to answer these questions. The framework emphasizes two essential dimensions of interpersonal effectiveness: competence (your perceived authority and productivity) and emotional intelligence (your warmth, approachability, and kindness). The sweet spot—Friendly Strength—is where these traits come together, creating trust and fostering collaboration.

To be a Likeable Badass, you don’t need to overhaul your personality. Instead, small, deliberate adjustments can make a big difference. As Ruha Benjamin reminds us in Viral Justice, meaningful change starts with small actions. By refining how we communicate, adapt, learn, and manage, we can lead with confidence and compassion, embodying both competence and emotional intelligence.

Becoming a Likeable Badass

Alison Fragale’s Likeable Badass framework offers a compelling lens to explore these questions. The framework focuses on two dimensions of interpersonal effectiveness: strength (your perceived competence and authority) and likability (your approachability and friendliness). Depending on how these traits combine, you fall into one of four quadrants:

• Friendly Strength: Competent and approachable—this is the sweet spot for leadership and collaboration.
• Hostile Strength: Competent but unapproachable—results come at the cost of relationships.
• Friendly Weakness: Approachable but less assertive—risks being overlooked.
• Hostile Weakness: Neither competent nor approachable—least effective and best avoided.

The goal is to operate primarily in the Friendly Strength quadrant, where competence and connection create trust and productive relationships. However, shifting into this quadrant isn’t a grand, all-or-nothing effort. It’s about small, deliberate adjustments—an idea that aligns closely with Ruha Benjamin’s Viral Justice.

The Power of Small Changes

In Viral Justice, Ruha Benjamin emphasizes that meaningful change often begins with small, deliberate actions. Whether we’re tackling systemic inequities or rethinking how we interact with colleagues, it’s the seemingly minor shifts that build momentum and lead to larger transformation.

In the context of Fragale’s framework, this means paying attention to small behaviors that affect how others perceive your strength and likability. For instance, consistently showing up prepared for meetings (a marker of competence) and being intentional about active listening (a marker of approachability) are simple yet powerful ways to move toward Friendly Strength. Over time, these habits compound, fostering trust and collaboration.

Benjamin’s philosophy also ties closely to Carol Dweck’s growth mindset, which frames challenges as opportunities for learning. Just as small changes can drive systemic progress, a growth mindset allows us to make incremental improvements in our leadership style. Each interaction becomes a chance to refine how we present ourselves and engage with others.

Anchoring Growth in the CALM Framework

The CALM framework—Communication, Adaptability, Learning, and Management—offers a structured approach to applying these ideas in academic library leadership. By focusing on these four elements, librarians can navigate internal demands and external expectations with confidence.

• Communication: Effective communication aligns library goals with institutional priorities. For example, framing library initiatives in terms of student success or retention ensures your efforts resonate with administrators. Small adjustments, like summarizing key points for clarity, can transform how others perceive your competence and approachability.
• Adaptability: Change is inevitable in higher education. Anticipating and responding to shifting directives ensures your library remains agile. For instance, if a proposal doesn’t succeed initially, recalibrating your message to better align with institutional goals can build trust and move the idea forward.
• Learning: Continuous reflection is essential. Each meeting, email, or project is an opportunity to assess what worked and what didn’t, refining your approach over time. This culture of learning helps your library stay innovative and informed.
• Management: Balancing internal operations with external expectations requires intentionality. Using tools like ClickUp to organize tasks or maintaining regular feedback loops with staff ensures that your library’s internal success translates into external recognition.

For example, suppose you’re trying to manage up with an administrator resistant to change. You might start with a small, concrete step: crafting a concise proposal that connects your idea to institutional goals. By communicating clearly and aligning your approach with their perspective, you make it easier for them to trust your expertise. If the initial attempt doesn’t succeed, adaptability allows you to revise and try again, using each interaction to refine your strategy.

Managing Up, Managing Yourself

Fragale’s framework is not just about understanding how others perceive you; it’s also a mirror for self-leadership. The quadrants offer a lens to evaluate your interpersonal tendencies and guide intentional growth. Are you leaning too heavily into results, finding yourself in Hostile Strength, where competence comes at the cost of approachability? Or do you prioritize harmony, drifting into Friendly Weakness, where approachability overshadows assertiveness?

Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward transformation. Self-awareness allows you to identify when your default tendencies may not serve you or your goals. For instance, if you often shy away from asserting your ideas to avoid conflict, you might be perceived as less effective, even when your insights are valuable. Conversely, if you prioritize efficiency over empathy, you may unintentionally alienate colleagues or stakeholders.

Making meaningful changes doesn’t require drastic reinvention. Leadership growth happens through small, deliberate adjustments that align with your goals and values. Here’s how:

• Set Clear Boundaries: If you tend to overextend yourself, practice saying no or delegating tasks when appropriate. Clear boundaries signal strength and respect for your time, encouraging others to value it as well.
• Adjust Your Tone: If your communication style leans toward Hostile Strength, soften your approach to make space for collaboration. Simple changes—like asking open-ended questions or inviting feedback—can transform how others perceive your leadership.
• Develop Assertiveness: If you find yourself in Friendly Weakness, work on confidently expressing your ideas. Start small by speaking up in low-stakes situations and gradually build the confidence to advocate for larger initiatives.
• Reflect and Recalibrate: After key interactions, take time to reflect. Did your tone, approach, or behavior align with your goals? Regular self-assessment ensures you stay intentional in your leadership journey.
• Celebrate Progress: Leadership is a journey, not a destination. Recognize and celebrate the small shifts you make, as they contribute to long-term growth and relational success.

Ultimately, self-leadership is about balancing strength and likability in ways that are authentic to you. By regularly assessing where you fall within Fragale’s framework and making intentional adjustments, you can align your leadership style with your values, foster trust, and navigate relationships with confidence and care.

Becoming a Likeable Badass in Academic Librarianship: Leading with Confidence and CALM

Picture this: You’re in a meeting with your institution’s administration, advocating for an essential library initiative. You’ve prepared meticulously, presenting compelling data to support your case. But as you look around the table, you sense hesitation. Questions arise, not about the merits of your proposal, but about whether the library can deliver.

What went wrong? Despite your competence, perhaps the presentation lacked warmth—a connection that fosters trust and collaboration. Or maybe, in striving to avoid conflict, you softened your message too much, leaving doubts about the library’s ability to lead. These moments, though challenging, offer an opportunity to reflect and grow.

In academic librarianship, we wear many hats—leaders, collaborators, advocates, and mediators. Navigating these roles requires more than expertise; it demands emotional intelligence and the ability to balance strength with warmth. How do we advocate for ourselves, our teams, and our libraries without alienating those we need to influence?

Alison Fragale’s Likeable Badass framework offers a roadmap to answer these questions. By combining competence (your authority and productivity) with emotional intelligence (your approachability and kindness), you can find the sweet spot: Friendly Strength. This is where trust flourishes, collaboration thrives, and leadership shines.

To be a Likeable Badass, you don’t need to overhaul your personality. Instead, as Ruha Benjamin reminds us in Viral Justice, meaningful change starts with small, deliberate actions. By refining how we communicate, adapt, learn, and manage, we can lead with confidence and compassion, embodying both competence and emotional intelligence.

Summary

To be a Likeable Badass in academic librarianship, you need more than just competence or kindness—you need both. Success comes from pairing emotional intelligence with authority, balancing productivity with warmth, and consistently showing up as both effective and approachable.

Fragale’s framework shows us how to align competence and emotional intelligence, while Ruha Benjamin’s philosophy reminds us that transformation is built on small, intentional changes. The CALM framework provides the tools to put these ideas into action: communicating clearly, adapting to challenges, learning from feedback, and managing relationships thoughtfully.

Ultimately, leadership isn’t about perfection. It’s about consistency, authenticity, and growth. By embracing small shifts—actively listening, setting boundaries, and celebrating progress—you can create trust, foster collaboration, and navigate the complexities of academic librarianship with confidence and care.

The journey to Friendly Strength isn’t an endpoint; it’s a daily practice of aligning your values, actions, and relationships. Start small, stay intentional, and remember: competence and emotional intelligence are the twin engines of truly impactful leadership.

Practical Takeaways for Academic Librarians

• Start Small:
  Identify one specific behavior to improve your leadership style. For instance:

  • Active Listening: In your next team meeting, focus on paraphrasing what others say to show you’re engaged and understand their perspective.
  • Refining Communication: Before your next presentation, practice delivering your key points in 1-2 sentences for clarity and impact.

• Embrace Challenges:
  View setbacks as opportunities to grow rather than as failures. For example:

  • Failed Proposal: If an initiative is rejected, ask for specific feedback. Use it to refine your next attempt or identify alternate ways to achieve your goals.
  • Tough Feedback: After receiving critical input, take time to reflect. Identify one actionable improvement and implement it in your next interaction.

• Leverage CALM:
  Integrate the four components of the CALM framework into your daily leadership practices:

  • Communication: Before your next email or meeting, ask yourself, “Is my message clear and aligned with the audience’s priorities?”
  • Adaptability: When faced with resistance, try reframing your approach. For example, align your proposal with institutional goals like student success or retention.
  • Learning: Schedule 10 minutes at the end of each day to reflect on what worked and what didn’t. Keep a journal to track patterns.
  • Management: Use tools like task planners or feedback loops to ensure you stay organized and align team efforts with broader goals.

• Be Consistent:
  Small, steady changes build trust and credibility over time. For example:

  • Commit to one relational behavior for a month, like expressing appreciation to colleagues weekly.
  • Regularly demonstrate both competence (e.g., by delivering accurate, timely results) and kindness (e.g., by checking in with team members about their workload).